In my next life I think I want to be French.  Well, maybe not really French.  Let me rephrase that: in my next life I would like to be born with a French essence.  Yes, yes, that's what I mean...


The past week I seem to have been bombarded by all things French.  French books (My Life in France by Julia Child; A Year in the Merde by Stephen Clarke; an accidental run in with a French Vogue), French films (A Good Year, Chocolat, French Kiss), and I now have (or maybe have always had) the idea that I would be much more fabulous if my personality lent itself to the subtle, red-lipsticked ideal of a French woman.  

Now, quite often I like to think that I have some of those suave tendencies.  A slight sophistication, a classic style, and maybe a hint of that je ne sais quoi-- HOWEVER, those thoughts and dreams have just gone KAPUT since after handing the friendly termite exterminator (who showed up at my house this morning at 8 a.m.) a handful of Cadbury chocolates, I proclaimed:  IT MAKES A DAY SO MUCH BETTER WHEN YOU HAVE SOME CHOCOLATE IN YOUR POCKET!!! 

Now.  What followed was:
a)  That awkward moment where you think to yourself:  Did I just rhyme???  
b)  Then comes the more awkward moment:  Does he think I meant to rhyme???
c)  Then you realize:  I am so not French.  Juliette Binoche would not have said that.  And she even starred in CHOCOLAT.  Damn it....

Believe it or not, every once in a while I am cool.  I call it when I am my "James Bond self"... i.e.  cool.  But, then before I know it, just when I'm about to say something terribly simple, classy, and to the point like: Shaken, not stirred.  I say something like: It makes a day so much better when you have some chocolate in your pocket.  Yep.  Just when I'm starting to feel the ooh la la of French charm, I end up with the oh no no no...  But, I'm working on it.  Chocolates in my pockets and all.

I doubt the French even eat Cadbury chocolate.  I'm sure they whip up a fantastic creme brulee or something.  Or maybe they just have a baguette and a cigarette.  Either way, I don't see the French walking around with chocolates in their pockets.  They probably don't even have pockets.


Anyway.


I hope you had a chance to read PETER PAN-- and if (for some crazy reason) you missed it this time 'round, please read it in the future.  It's just lovely.  (And if you didn't get around to PETER PAN, hopefully you had a chance to at least check out the fabulous FUG GIRLS.)



I have also officially finished Mrs. Child's MY LIFE IN FRANCE.  It was interesting.  I love Julia and I love, love, love her personality and gumption (and how I do love to use the word gumption)-- but I found her book a little slow.  However, if you're all about the cooking and loving of France, this is a decent read.  I probably will not read it again--but the film made me giddy and just oh so happy-- so, this time 'round I am going to go with Meryl Streep's version.  And I'm okay with that.

As for my next reading adventure, I'm probably going to go with another classic and that is DRACULA by Bram Stoker.  This is for two reasons.  First, because it is OH SO close to Halloween.  And Halloween happens to be my favorite holiday.  Absolute favorite.  No contenders.  Besides Christmas, that is.


Now, I don't like scary scary Halloween-- I like a slightly vampiric Disney like version.  This means I dress up, eat candy, drink, carve pumpkins, go outside to smell the essence of fall in the air, and watch HOCUS POCUS because it is awesome.  And, since I love vampires (this would be reason number 2) as much as pirates (who doesn't love pirates--especially when they are portrayed by Johnny Depp), I'm going to go ahead and read DRACULA.  For those of you who went ahead and added the STANZA application on your iPhone (again, it's free) you can read DRACULA very easily.  I've read the first few chapters and it's a lot more entertaining than I had expected.  So, for those of you who have the time, read it.  Although (for some reason), I have a discouraging feeling that many people will skip this...  Anyway, that's what I'm going to read until I pick up something new from the bestseller list.  

On the subject of vampires, below are some other books that are said to be worth the read:


1)  INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE by Anne Rice
2)  TWILIGHT by Stephenie Meyer
3)  THE HISTORIAN by Elizabeth Kostova
4)  THE VAMPIRE LESTAT by Anne Rice
5)  LIVING DEAD IN DALLAS by Charlaine Harris (Now TRUE BLOOD on HBO)



And that's all I'm going to list.  Because if I list anymore, I'm going to sound creepy and I'm not creepy.  But, it is the right month for vampire novels, so if DRACULA doesn't suit your fancy, you can always try one of the above.  You could also always watch episodes of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER because, really, that's just good fun.  I'll leave it up to you.  Halloween is a very personal thing.

And, quickly, before I go-- (where am I going to?)-- Halloween reminded me of a series that I'd also like to give a shout out to.  The only bad Halloween I've ever had consisted of me being stuck indoors with a less than remarkable roommate.  How I wished I was somewhere that had trick-or-treaters and costumes and caramel apples!  But, alas, sometimes (hopefully only once) you find yourself stuck indoors with an unworthy companion.  The only good thing about the evening was ABC aired the Halloween episode of PUSHING DAISIES.  AND I LOVE PUSHING DAISIES.  Unfortunately, due to the Writer's Strike (which was totally called for by the way, if you are a writer, I was on your side), the show had a fairly lackluster 2nd season and got canceled.  

HOWEVER, the first season of PUSHING DAISIES should not be missed.  You can purchase the first season for around twenty bucks and it's so worth it.  It's filled with cleverness, colors, Kristin Chenoweth, and a man who owns a pie shop who's loved the same girl since he was 8 years old.  It's beautiful-- rather like hour long episodes of a happy Tim Burton-esque magical world.  And it's fun.  And the kids will love it too.  Just so great.  BUY IT.

And I must say that the "Pie Maker" and his sweet pie shop makes me think:  You know what?  I don't need your creme brulee.  Or your baguette and cigarette, for that matter.  Because I've got gumption (such a good word) and a little bit of style and I may even rhyme every once in a while... 


And that is just fine.

Maybe I'll be French for Halloween. 



"I had come to the conclusion that I must really be French, only no one had ever informed me of this fact."  -Julia Child "My Life in France"